When you pray, go into a room alone and close the door. Pray to your Father in private. He knows what is done in private and will reward you. ~ Matthew 6:6 For the first time since beginning my blog I have encountered a period where I am struggling to find the words to write. I don't want to say I have "writer's block," because to me that means something is preventing me from doing what I love. Instead, I am trying to redirect my thoughts while sitting on my back patio, as rain falls, and a wind chime gently creates a melody as the rain accumulates on the metal tubes and is caught by the breeze.
Like the wind chimes in the rain, dulled by the water dripping, that is how I seem to acknowledge what I am feeling at this time. For any of us, there will be rainy days, where the events of our life seem to overwhelm our abilities to be us. The headlines in the newspapers. A poor night's sleep. Stress from family events. Issues with our car, or even a difficult time in a relationship. All are things that can cause our life to sound or feel different. That's why it is so important for us to find a sacred place that is "ours." I've come to know that being in, or around nature, is sacred to me. Where is your place? Jesus reminds us that it is important for us to find a place where we may find it possible to pray and to allow for God to speak. A place, when we have encountered the storm, we can hear the words Jesus spoke while tossed by the waves, "Peace, be still." It is the place where our soul can rest. Where our mind might become clear, and our body renewed. It is important to acknowledge when we have struggles. It is not an admission of weakness. Instead, it is allowing for ourselves to be known better, so that we can once again find a place where we can share, "It is well with my soul." Stay in God's grip! G. Todd Williams (c) 2018
0 Comments
20,089 days ago today was a Thursday. The temperature that day in Indianapolis started in the low 50's. The sun would rise and fall, with the afternoon temperature near 80. The early fall day was more like a summer day. I took my first breath at 11:15 PM, and entered the world bruised and sore, having been manipulated and then brought forth by forceps. To this day my ear is creased where the metal piece of equipment bent and broke the cartilage in my ear as I was pulled into the world.
My parents were young, and had just celebrated their first anniversary of marriage a few weeks before my birth. My dad still tells the story of the "days of labor," my mother endured, including the more than a dozen fathers he saw come and go while waiting on my arrival. Someone asked me what my first memories were as a child? I think it was music. I'm pretty sure I was laying somewhere and I could hear singing. Since my father and his brothers would often get together and sing, I would like to think my first memory was of my dad and uncles singing. A patient recently asked me when did I first know of Jesus or God? My response? I don't ever remember not knowing that there was God and Jesus, who somehow together were making sure everything was okay. I'm not sure if it was my Papaw Williams who was a minister, or perhaps my Great Grandmother DeAtley, or maybe Reverend Mangold at the Christian Church, who told me that Jesus loved me, always. I think I realized that there was truly a God the day I walked into the hospital room where my sister had just given birth to her first son. Holding him, and realizing that every day lived up to that point mattered, but every day henceforth somehow needed to mean more. A person asked me today if I could go back, or relive some time, or change something in my life, what would it be? The first thing that came to mind were the late night hours of rocking both of my babies, but I quickly realized how amazing they both are now as adults. I thought about some people I have hurt along the way, while finding my own journey, or from some decisions I have made, and I hope that I have asked for forgiveness, or told them that I was sorry. I think I actually love being this age. I can count more blessings than disappointments. Just a while ago, I was asked, "What do you have planned special for your birthday?" In all honesty, the most special thing happened before the sun even came up this morning. A call came from one of the nurses I work with who asked if I would pray with a family about 3:30 am this morning. One of our patients was in the last moments of life, and I got to say the final words for he and his family before he took his last breath. As I sit and finish up a few more notes today, while reading so many expressions of love shared by family and friends on this birth date of mine, I am overcome with this sense that all is well. Someone asked me, "What is the most important lesson you have learned in your life?" That question left me silent. I made a joke and said, "Not to post the first thing that pops into my head on Facebook when it comes to politics, family, or religion." The most important thing that I am still learning is that I am capable of love, even when I struggle to love myself, and that every person has value. I still have hope, even when the situation seems hopeless. I can't begin to describe how wonderful everyone's words have meant to me today. Even the questions asked have reminded me that I have some amazing people in my life. 20,089 days. Now that is something to celebrate! Stay in God's grip! "Therefore, return to your God, Observe kindness and justice, And wait for your God continually."
~ Hosea 12:6 I don't know about you, but lately I have felt the significant presence of the word, "wait." I know, as busy as I seem to be all the time, this word is not just a part of my prayer life, but in my tangible life as well. I don't mind waiting. Actually, I've become quite good at doing just that. The idea, or thought of waiting, in our culture is just not something that we value. I often think that's why we all seem to have difficulty with the process of waiting. Oh, I'm like most folks. I can say I've learned to wait, but inside there is still the anxiety. Waiting on a committee. Waiting to hear about the next step for a project. Waiting, waiting, waiting.... The signpost needs to simply say, "wait upon the Lord." Yes, I said it. The proverbial "It's God's timing." That's the one day in Seminary I paid close attention because next to, "It was God's plan," is the punctuality of the Creator statements that we all have heard plenty of times. (Next to, "How are you?" "I'm fine" statements) For any of us, the process and the educational presence of the idea of waiting is fundamental to our faith and daily life. At this point in my life I simply want to ask God why it has taken me so long to learn this! Stay in God's grip! G. Todd Williams (c) 2018 "The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands. Day after day they pour forth speech; night after night they display knowledge. There is no speech or language where their voice is not heard."
~ Psalm 19: 1-3 There is something about breaking bread, lifting a cup in prayer, and the words reminding us that bread represented a body broken, and that a cup represented blood that would be poured out for many. When God took on flesh in Jesus Christ, the Divine and the created, the eternal and the temporal became united. This unity now means that all who live now, shall live forever. Everything mortal now points to the immortal Creator. In and through Jesus all creation has become the means for the face of God to be revealed to us. What I have discovered is that all things are sacred because God has spoken all things into existence. There is a redeeming quality in all things and everyone because with each creative stroke of the master, it is done in love. We aren't just here. We are an intentional part of the masterpiece! Seas and winds, mountains and trees, sun, moon, and stars, and all the animals and people have become sacred windows offering us glimpses of God. The sky above declares the glory of God, and we are reflective of God's glory. Let it shine, let it shine! Stay in God's grip! G. Todd Williams (c) 2018 But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.
~ Isaiah 40: 31 A few years ago I was walking the beach one morning. I asked a woman who was walking as well, to wave her arms when I reached a place to take this photo. I wanted her to cause the birds to rise together. When I reached a good vantage point, I motioned her. She let out a loud scream and waved her hands. I about fell over because not only did she frighten the birds, but I was not expecting the loud scream! I snapped a few shots, started laughing, and then asked if she was okay. I love the photo, and love the memory. There is something about "being ready, or prepared." So much of what our faith is based on, is the need to be ready. Ready for Christ. Ready for the unexpected. Ready for... you name it. I grew up with the family motto, "Nothing is as permanent as change." For us, it's not to a need to be ready as much as it was about reality. It has been proven time and time again to be true in my life, and has become not just a motto, but words of advice as well. I don't know what it is about being a pastor that seems to bring those moments when someone questions, "so do you think we're living in the end times?" My honest answer, "I don't know." What do you think? I do believe that there is still the need for, and the presence of hope for each new day. I'm grateful to know that for each of us, no matter how much change, or perhaps how the world may be perceived, God's love does not change. I can't prepare myself any more than simply acknowledging and believing that no matter what may happen tomorrow, God will make sure I'm ready. That is a promise for each of us. Stay in God's grip! G. Todd Williams (c) 2018 And he said, “The kingdom of God is as if a man should scatter seed on the ground. He sleeps and rises night and day, and the seed sprouts and grows;he knows not how. The earth produces by itself, first the blade, then the ear, then the full grain in the ear. But when the grain is ripe, at once he puts in the sickle, because the harvest has come.”
~ Mark 4:26 - 29 Over the weekend I spent time with a few college students at United Campus Ministries of Greater Houston listening to them talk about the current political climate. It was interesting to hear how they are learning to recognize the power that they already possess, noting that this young generation has the ability now to create change. One of the girls began to talk about the importance of planting seeds at this point, so that in the future things such as racism, poverty, and many other things that seem to divide our nation might be healed. She commented, "There is a difference between planting seeds of hope, and burying our issues and not dealing with them." She reminded us that some seeds that we plant will require time and patience, noting that, "Trees require deep roots before they can begin to grow towards the sky." With these words I was reminded that God asks us to sow seeds that will produce "good fruits," or at least faith, hope and love. It is not always easy for us to wait. I can remember years ago watching a bean seed slowly begin to send out roots prior to sending forth the first sprout. She continued and reminded us that not all seeds are meant for us. "Some seeds, like some that we now have, won't begin to send forth the first signs of growth, until they have sufficiently taken root, but we still must plant and care for them. That is the only way that the future may know of their presence." Great words of wisdom for all of us, and the reminder that the seeds of our life are among the most important that we possess, and how we plant them, will effect the future for generations to come. What seeds of faith will you plant today? Stay in God's grip! G. Todd Williams (c) 2018 "I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you."
- John 14: 18 At some point in our life, we will all experience loneliness. It is real and can be a life-changing experience for many. I wish that I could say, "but you're never really alone," and immediately a person's perspective would change. But for many, even the feeling of abandonment by God can and does happen. Sometimes the silence in our hearts, and the emptiness of the moment can seem like eternity when we find that we are waiting on an answer. Awaiting the echo of your voice in a dark valley can be comforting, but when the voice is not yours, but instead a comforting message of hope to your call, brings the assurance that you are not alone. Remember that whatever you may go through, there has been someone who has felt just like you. Even in a moment of great darkness for Christ he cried out, "Why have you abandoned me?" The truth of the matter is that we were created by a God that must have known that loneliness as well. I have often wondered what the years of darkness and nothingness of the universe must have been like before God declared, "Let there be light." You are not alone. In times of loneliness consider the moment and that while you wait, may you find the grace your heart desires to move forward and know you are not alone. "I will be with you always..." Stay in God's grip! G. Todd Williams (c) 2018 Let no-one say when he is tempted, "I am being tempted by God"; for God cannot be tempted by evil, and he himself cannot be tempted by anyone.
~ James 1:13 How many of us have heard it said, or we even said it ourselves, "The devil made me do it?" Understanding choice is something we begin to have understanding of early in life. Why do you think one of the first words we learn as a child is "NO!" Mastering the ability to make good choices is a life-long lesson. I'm glad that with age and experiences we learn what choices are good for us. This sculpture was part of a traveling group of angels at Discovery Green in Houston a few years ago. Angels are fascinating to me and their role as "messenger." They are a reminder to me that God has been in the business for all eternity of helping us to make the right decisions. Angels are just one way that God attempts to keep us on the right path. Of course, we can be that for one another as well. Our own failed attempts and life lessons can do exactly the same for others. Being able to take suggestions, good and bad, can make the difference between living a life with steps of faith, stumbles, or falls. May we all find that each step and decision is balanced by our faith and by our experiences. Stay in God's grip! G. Todd Williams (c) 2018 Thus says the Lord, “Do justice and righteousness, and deliver the one who has been robbed from the power of his oppressor. Also do not mistreat or do violence to the stranger, the orphan, or the widow ~ Jeremiah 22:3 The widow. The orphan. The stranger.
The Hebrew scriptures are full of stories of people from all walks of life, but among the most valued are the roles of those who were most vulnerable; The widow, orphan and the stranger. One of the most striking statements I encountered this week was of that of a coworker who just lost her husband. As she shared of the things she has been experiencing, including all of the things that she must do as the surviving spouse, she stated, "I am learning how to be a widow." Her words were filled with vulnerability, and of courage, all at the same time. It was a declaration, while also a reminder of the loss that she has encountered. While a lot has changed in society concerning these three roles, our need to care for these folks has not. I grew up wirh a great grandmother who took the understanding of the stranger to heart. Often she would set an additional plate at the table, reminding us, "We must be ready for the stranger that might happen by." This grew out of a time when as a child, she and her family traveled the Old National Road in a wagon into the new frontier. They would stop at the homes of strangers along the way, and were often invited in for dinner. She shared that many times there would already be an extra setting at the table, as if to say, "We were expecting you." Hospitality to the widow, orphan and stranger is something we can all extend and experience. Being instruments of the living Christ means that we are agents of hospitality to those around us, offering comfort and words of welcome. For any of us, our role can and does change throughout our life. Being present in those roles, or being those offering hospitality, is our reminder that caring for the least of these, is the most important role that we will ever encounter. Stay in God's grip! G. Todd Williams (c) 2018 Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed. ~ Mark 1:35 We live in a world where self-imposed expectations can cause us to become anxious, or even lose our way. I have often wondered if Jesus were walking the streets today what he would say or do with the person who has too much on his mind?
The older I get I seem to value the times that I can step away from every day life. Perhaps Jesus "going off to pray," should be a hint for those of us who seem to have too much going on? Our ability to rest, and to seek time away, should be a normal part of our life. Additionally, we should not allow others, or even our own self, to make us feel guilty when we realize that the only way to work through something is to take a break. This week I had that happened to me. I'm not sure if it has been because it has rained every day this week? Maybe it is grief from memories that linger from milestones in my life. Remembering 9/11, recovering a year ago from Hurricane Harvey, or ten years ago when Hurricane Ike hit our city. Maybe it has been the reality of a patient's condition that I have grown to care for who now is showing signs that she is declining more each day? Perhaps it is because I find that I'm once again recovering from another jaw surgery a week ago that still has my mouth full of stitches. I'm beginning to sound like someone who needs to "go off and pray!" Discovering a sacred place is probably the most powerful thing we can do for ourselves. Allowing the time for us to enter this place for any period of time to pray or to allow for rest is necessary. I believe that if we were all honest with ourselves, we would all agree that our care for self at some point, is the beginning of our ability to truly care for others, or to address our own "plate" that may seem to be overwhelmingly full. A patient of mine recently shared, "You know, they say that God never gives us more than we can handle. I have to disagree. Sometimes I think God allows us to have too much to see what we will do with it. It's not that God plans for that to happen. No, we simply do it to ourselves, and then God sits back and waits to see what we will do. It reminds me of when my kids were young and their eyes were bigger than their stomachs. I'd sit there and tell them they had to figure out what they were going to do." She is 101 years old. I figure she probably knows a little bit about this! In the meantime, we all must seek a place of sacredness. Allow the time to be present in that space, and to remember that caring for ourselves first should never be a source of guilt, but rather a place to discover wholeness. Stay in God's grip! G. Todd Williams (c) 2018ou “You said, ‘Listen now, and I will speak; I will question you, and you shall answer me.’ ~ Job 42:4 I remember sitting in my first philosphy class at Indiana University and the professor placed one word on the chalk board and asked us to respond in writing as a midterm grade. The word he wrote was, "Why?"
After writing the word, he looked at us, told us "good luck," and then left the room. I remember the entire class looking at one another. A few folks chuckled. Of course the "serious" students got right to work. I remember looking out the window. It was a cloudy day as most days are in Indiana, when winter tries to hold on, and dirty piles of last month's snow are left in the shade of the limestone buildings. For a moment I began to worry about whether my answer would change some poetic course in time. Again I looked around the room, as more of the class was now quietly writing away. There was no getting around the only answer I could think of at the time. Could it be that easy? Was there some reading I missed that seemed to now be the answer that my fellow sufferers of the question now seemed to be repeating in some answer form? It's funny how as an older adult now I can think of all kinds of ways to respond to this question, but on that day I felt like the day Job and God got into a discussion following Job's total life-change. The word that Job absolutely had every right to ask was only three letters and now was confronting me as some torment by a professor, who in this case, was the Alpha and Omega when it came to my answer and whether I would pass or fail this test. I have to admit, I have asked God that question more than once because I am not Job, and if truth be told, I probably ask God that question every time a news headline occurs where something happens that forever changes a person's life, or an entire community. It is the question that many of us raised on this day 17 years ago when planes became weapons, and buildings tumbled. It also touches our lips when we hear of a friend's untimely death, a poor prognosis, or even when we are told "No," after working so hard towards a goal. We are not unlike the original creation who wanted to know why a tree of knowledge would bear fruit that the original inhabitants were warned not to eat. I was bold that day and wrote what was the first answer that came to mind. Could it be really that easy? What might this do to my future in the class? Or for that matter, my next semester in college? I wrote my answer, and stared across the room as others continued to write. I tore my paper up and started again. Again I wrote the same thing. I closed my eyes and dropped my pencil. I don't remember thinking anything else, except maybe making a paper airplane out of the paper so it would be easier for the professor to sail it out the window. I grabbed my things and decided to leave. I left my paper on the desk. I was that dreaded, "first one done." I didn't look back. I went to the student union and got a sugar cookie from the bakery and a hot cup of coffee to wash it down. I sat and thought about my answer, and began to mount my defense of my answer for when the time would come that I would have to explain, as if I were someone about to defend my actions before God so that I might enter heaven. The word "Why?" is one that both we and God encounter each day. I'm unsure of a lot of things, but one thing I am aware of is that we live in an imperfect world, and sometimes we are part of that imperfection. The creation that God created to be "good" has been changed by the generations of choices made before we arrived. "God's plan," is filled with ways for us to make our way through these encounters, and remains with us through every moment. My response that day? "Why not?" I got a C for effort. I realize that often I don't seem to hear a response when I ask God, "Why?" I feel it is often God waiting for me to ask, "If I do this, will it make a difference?" Stay in God's grip! G. Todd Williams (c) 2018 "To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven"
~ Ecclesiastes 3:1 Growing up in Indiana, I used to just love the fall. The hills and hollers would turn into a sea of red and orange. If you were to shuffle your feet while you walked, you could hear the sound of autumn as leaves crunched beneath your feet. It's interesting how different seasons promote different memories. Although I miss those moments, for me now as an adult, the thought of fall is quickly a reminder that winter will soon follow. Aging is a process that we all encounter. I was reminded several years ago that we are Ecclesiastical people. Our lives are marked by seasons, or chapters. Our ability to maneuver through seasons, or situations in our lives, mark both our successes and challenges. Years of education, jobs, and the journeys as we create relationships. Autumn also reminds me of the term, "golden years," when we begin to reflect on all of these things, and prepare to enter our next journey as we die. Choosing to end one chapter and beginning the next can be created in many things. What's difficult for many of us is when a chapter ends abruptly, leaving us feeling like a failure because it may not have ended as we had hoped. Sometimes those endings leave us filled with uncertainty as a new chapter begins, and the fear of failure, or unsure of how to begin again paralyzes us. For the trees of the forest, the leaves that sprout forth in spring helps to identify the type of tree. While the green color of summer may look like the rest of the summer, the onset of autumn reveals much more. So it is with our lives until touched by God, who then reveals to us who we can truly be. Even as the leaves are surrendered in the fall, and the onset of winter leaves the tree bare. There is always the spring that will once again cause the cycle to begin again. God is always like that. Even while we look at a chapter in our life ending, God has the next chapter ready to be written. To everything there is a season... Stay in God's grip! G. Todd Williams (c) 2018 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." ~ Matthew 11:28 - 30
I have a dear friend that seems to have the weight of the world on her shoulders. Have you, or anyone you know, ever felt like that? The world doesn't land that way! It doesn't just seem to land there. No, it must find a way. There are some that just seem to have a real talent for picking it up, and allowing it to perch, not even balanced, just between the shoulders, behind the neck! There are worries in the world, and then there are obsessive worriers. I worry about these kinds of folks. No pun intended. I wonder about people like this because I don't know if they truly know rest or joy, or what it means to have peace in their lives. God reminds us that it is not the well who need a physician. God came into the world through Christ so that we might all have life abundantly. So that we aren't faced with worry, doubt, our heavy burdens. It's almost as if God proclaimed, "I've got this, now relax." Sometimes it's difficult to let go. Besides those that worry, there are those who MUST be in control! Surrendering and allowing are two of the most life-learning, heavy world holding, objectives that must be overcome in order to really let go and let God! It's one thing to lead, or direct, it's another thing to allow God to carry you and provide support. I hope that today the weight of the world's problems are given over to the One who best understands. The One who can work through all situations. And the One that has offered to carry that load for us. Love yourself.... take a load off! Stay in God's grip! G. Todd Williams (c) 2018 Have no fear, for I am with you; do not be looking about in trouble, for I am your God; I will give you strength, yes, I will be your helper; yes, my true right hand will be your support. ~ Isaiah 41:10 This morning I read a friend's story of how physical pain and depression nearly caused him to take his own life. We don't always know the pain that others carry. There is no easy answer for everything, and sometimes just telling someone, "I will be praying for you," isn't enough.
I have shared before that my taking photos and writing about what I am feeling all came about because of an exercise following a terrible bout with depression, and that the discipline of writing each day actually came out of that experience. I wish that among the journeys that are shared of Christ in the gospels that somewhere he would have encounteted, "the man with depression." Of course, many of the miracles that he performed helped to change the lives of those he touched. I have often wondered with so many people suffering from PTSD today, if those he cured ever worried about once again becoming ill or paralyzed in some way? Living beyond our pain, experiences, or times when we have been overwhelmed by something is what Jesus asks us to do when he tells us that there will be a place that he will prepare for us where our lives will be filled with peace, and that eternity will replace death, and we will live in harmony. All of which serves to help us through our daily life, and to encourage us. But making it through our daily life just simply can seem to be too much at times. I'm thankful for the fact that my friend is still with us, and for his courage to tell his story, and I pray that he will find a way to take his experience to discover a new way of addessing his pain. For those who may sense that things are too much, or are overwhelming, please reach out and ask for help. It is not a sign of weakness, or that your faith seems to be failing. It is a chance for hope and for healing. If you or someone needs help, please reach out and call the suicide hotline at 1-800-273-8255. It is available 24 hours everyday. Stay in God's grip! G. Todd Williams (c) 2018 Jesus said to her, "Everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again, but those who drink of the water that I will give them will never be thirsty. The water that I will give will become in them a spring of water gushing up to eternal life." The woman said to him, "Sir, give me this water, so that I may never be thirsty or have to keep coming here to draw water." ~ John 4:13-15 It's interesting how we sometimes struggle to change or to adapt to "fit in" or to be what others want us to be. Years ago one of the churches I served had a beautiful stained glass window. The story it depicted was of Jesus meeting the woman at the well.
We all remember the story of Jesus meeting the woman, in the midday sun, who comes to the well to draw water. Jesus is alone. He asks her for a drink of water. She looks at him, and realizes many things. She is from Samaria, he is a Jew. She is a woman with a past, and because of her choices, now gathers water at noon, rather than in the early morning hours with the other woman. Jesus continues his conversation, talking about thirst. He shares about a well that is available to all, and when someone drinks from the well he discusses with her, they will never thirst again. Additionally he shares what he knows about her, and she finds that he reaches within her life and brings to light the struggles that she has lived with because of her choices. Within this story there are so many opportunities to shame or blame her for her choices, but instead offers that she simply go and "sin no more." It was as if he shared that she didn't need to seek out anything else. The woman she now is was enough. She simply needed to realize this! That the choices she made did not benefit who she was, and that this encounter would actually serve as a turning point. Jesus literally was telling her that she was enough, and that she simply go and sin no more. Finding a way to recognize the person that God has created us to be is sometimes hard to see because of what is around us. It is not so much that we must change. It is often more about realizing what surrounds us, and what we must decide to change that gets in the way of who God has created us to be. One of the hardest things for any of us to realize is that God loves us unconditionally. Even when our choices may reflect something different. Years ago when I worked with several young people involved in the sex trade on the streets of Houston, often the hardest thing to convince them of was the fact that they were deserving of God's love. Instead of sharing with them what was wrong in their life, we worked to allow them to see their gifts, and to refocus their journey. Sometimes it took months, offering support through professional counseling, or even rehabilitation to address addictions, but not once would any of us say, "You're not good enough." There will always exist in every human being a time when Jesus speaks, and asks us about what it is that we thirst for. Along with this question, there will always exist a response, which often includes love, and the words to "go and sin no more." Stay in God's grip! G. Todd Williams (c) 2018 |
AuthorRev. G. Todd Williams lives in the Houston metro area and is a Hospice Chaplain at Essential Hospice, Webster, Texas, and is an ordained Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) pastor. Archives
May 2023
|